Sometimes I Feel Like A Monkey

It's really hard to let go. Sometimes I feel like a monkey.
Those don't seem to have anything to do with each other, so let me explain.
In Africa, there is a breed of monkeys that have some very interesting habits of putting their hands where they don't belong. (Quite literally)
What trappers will do is place a piece of candy in a small hole inside a tree. Now the little monkey will scamper up to the tree to get the treat. In order to get its hand in there, it has to close its palm.
So, it's hand is in the tree and it has the candy. But, the hole is too narrow for the candy and its open hand to get out of. But, instead of letting go of the candy and running away, the monkey just sits there trying to get its hand out until the hunter comes along and hits it on the head.

And so, for that reason, I am sometimes like a monkey, not willing to let go.
Recently, some relationships have really been fading away and a whole season of my life is suddenly vanishing all together. It's becoming hard to remember what it was like. Change is accruing and recently, I've not been able to accept it. I keep trying to reach back and grab what was, but I need to move on. Maybe, one day, I come back there, but today is not that day. I need to accept where I am now. 'Cause if I don't I'm going to miss some awesome stuff.

Part of that is all my amazing friends at my school. God has been showing me more and more that this is the group of people that He really wants me to grow with. And, what that fully means, I don't know, but I do know that God has big plans, and I would love to be a part of them. And, tomorrow, I'm leaving to go on a retreat with all of them, so I'm really excited. I pray that God works in unimaginable ways there. And also, I pray that He teaches me further how to let go and follow after Him in faith.